Power Of A Moment

I was born a fighter.

From my earliest moments, I made my presence known and turned my parents’ world upside down.  I was strong-willed. I was loud. I was bold. I was a force to be reckoned with.

And I still am all those things…but as a result of walking with Jesus for many years, He has softened those hard edges, redeemed the ugly and replaced it with grace and beauty, and healed so many of my broken places.

I don’t have victory one hundred percent of the time, obviously, but I do walk as one who knows that I am deeply loved and completely forgiven  by the magnificent One who rescued me.

Just typing those words brings tears to my eyes. I was once told that I talk about Jesus too much. Well, I can’t talk about Him enough. He is everything to me. He is the very breath that I breathe and He has totally and completely captured my heart, soul, and mind.

I am a sinner saved by radical, earth-shattering  grace. I will never  get over that extraordinary truth for the rest of my days on this earth or on into eternity.

Last night, I watched a YouTube video of Beth’s Moore’s talk at Passion 2014 earlier this year. She quoted I Timothy 6:12, which encourages us to “fight the good fight of faith.”

Beth taught that in the original Greek, the word good also means “beautiful.” 

Fight the beautiful fight of faith.

The words beautiful and fight don’t really go together, do they? What is beautiful about a battle and a struggle?

It can only be a beautiful fight because it leads you deeper into the heart of the Beautiful One Himself, Jesus.

Is your life is hard right now? Are there things that Jesus has allowed that you do not understand? Are you left feeling confused, sad, discouraged, angry, hurt? Because after all, He could have stopped it, couldn’t He?

You, my friend, have a fight on your hands.

What are you going to do? How are you going to fight? Will you choose the ugly fight or the beautiful fight?

The ugly fight looks like this: You will complain to anyone within the sound of your voice at the unjust treatment you are receiving. You will live with a heaviness of heart as you contemplate how unfair God is being to you. You will constantly rehearse the problem in your mind. You will look at the lives of others who are in a seemingly happy season and allow envy and jealousy to darken your heart. You will seek escape  from your  reality through books, TV, movies, or games. You will host a lavish pity party for yourself every night.  You might stop going to church. Your Bible will remain unopened and begin collecting dust.  You hold onto unforgiveness like a drowning person would cling to a life preserver.  You grow very angry with God because you choose to believe the insidious and evil lies of the enemy that your God doesn’t care and has abandoned you.

Darkness wins.

How? Because you are fighting against Jesus rather than fighting alongside Him.

I have fought the ugly fight plenty of times. It never ends well. Trust me on this. Don’t start down that path. It can only end in defeat and misery and tremendous damage can be done.

On the other hand, the beautiful fight looks like this: Life gets hard. You do not retreat. You do not surrender. You do not live in denial. You determine at the outset that you will face this trial head on and you will walk straight through the middle of it until you reach the other side. You are undaunted and determined.

Yet, you are hurting. And that is normal. Never once does Jesus ask you to bury your feelings and pretend they don’t exist. He invites you to share them—no matter how ugly—with Him. He can take it. He cares. He listens. He understands. (After all, He endured everything we did and more when He walked this earth. He knows.).

So, wrestle it out with Him.  Take off the mask, lose the platitudes and the pretty prayers and get real. 

If this seems irreverent to you, begin to read the Psalms and you will see David, who was called a man after God’s own heart, openly expresses every emotion to his God. David was a man of tremendous passion. He never held anything back and we don’t have to either.

You have to put those emotions somewhere. So give them to your Savior, who can bear the full weight of them all. This is a process and one that you might have to keep going back to. That’s okay. This is how you drain the poison that, if allowed to fester, will destroy you.

This is where the beautiful fight really begins: Despite your feelings, you decide to walk in faith. Hebrews 11:1 declares faith to be “perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses.” You make the decision to place the truth of God’s Word over what you see and what you feel. You choose forgiveness toward those who have hurt you, knowing that Jesus will deal with them on your behalf. You trust His loving heart and His kind intention, no matter what happens. You embrace gratitude and in so doing, realize that there is beauty and light and joy to be found even on the darkest of days. You refuse to give in to fear and self-pity. You will continue to do good and minister to others.  You trade your weakness for His strength. You step into your God-given role as more than a conqueror. You accept His gift of peace to quiet your troubled heart. You open His Word and you cling to His promises. Every single time you get knocked down, you get back up.  You develop an eternal perspective rather than a temporal one, knowing that you cannot yet see the big picture of God’s grand redemptive plan. You take comfort in the knowledge that His ways are not your ways…but His ways are good and right and perfect.  You keep a running dialogue with Jesus, who is with you always. When the enemy comes at you with his lies, you silence him by speaking God’s promises over your situation…thus making you his worst nightmare.

You are taking your place alongside Jesus and watching as He fights on your behalf.

The result of this beautiful fight? Light and love triumph.

When the season passes, you will still be standing. You will have  grown in intimacy with Jesus because you have experienced Him in ways you never have before. You will be transformed into His likeness. You will have seen firsthand how He gives beauty for ashes and is able to redeem even the worst situation for His glory.

And in His eyes, you will be a beautiful warrior.

The choice is yours. Make the right one. You will never regret it.

I have discovered something recently.

I used to think of courage as being this grand, heroic gesture.

And it certainly is that.

However, sometimes, courage is revealed just by showing up, by choosing to get up and face another day when life is hard, by making the choice to believe God’s promises with all your heart and soul when circumstances mock those words that ring with the authority of eternal truth.

As I write this, my area of the country is getting yet another giant snowstorm. The world outside my window is blanketed in suffocating white and gray. There have been times over the past three months that my heart has felt  like that.

Just yesterday, we were treated to a preview of spring: bright sunshine, blue skies, and temperatures in the mid-forties. It was glorious, a foretaste of the wonderful season to come. But twenty four hours later, winter has come roaring back and I am over it.

This has been one of the worst winters in the life of my family, for a variety of reasons. Not only were we walloped with storm after nasty storm weather-wise, but an ugly betrayal by someone we trusted came to light in early January, leaving a lot of wreckage in its wake.

I have been angry, heartbroken, and sad. It has been a time of unprecedented wrestling with Jesus, as I deal with the fact that He has allowed this to happen (we really can be that honest with Him, you know), and as I ask Him fervently for His power that will allow me  to forgive. (That will be the subject of a separate post).

I have discovered that He listens and He answers. He empowers and He provides. He protects and He guides.

I have discovered that in Him, I am strong. I am brave. I am courageous.

Peace I leave with you; My own peace I now give to you…do not let your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and disturbed; and do not permit yourself to be fearful and intimidated and cowardly and unsettled. —Jesus (John 14:27, Amplified).

So, in the midst of the mess, I face what is happening head-on. No denial. No pretending. No cowering in fear. I refuse to allow this circumstance to defeat me or define me.

I  just keep showing up. I go to church and lead Bible study. I meet a friend for lunch.  I go on a date with my husband. I shoot a wedding. I make dinner. I celebrate our daughter getting her driver’s license and our son’s 18th birthday. I do my volunteer work. I write on this blog. I take lots of pictures with my beloved Nikon. I take a photography class.

I choose to trust His heart and His kind purpose even when I do not understand.

I make the decision to not surrender even one inch of ground to the enemy of my soul, who daily hopes for my collapse and defeat. When fear or anger rear their ugly heads, I refuse to dwell on them. Instead, I focus like a laser beam on the truth of His Word.

Not. One. Inch.

And that is what courage looks like.

Just like this seemingly endless winter will one day melt into spring, so this season in our lives will end and it will be a brand new day.

When that day comes, I will not limp across the finish line, barely able to walk. Instead, I will run across it, undefeated, free, and closer than ever to my Savior who constantly sustains me and gives me beauty for ashes.

Whatever you may be facing today, choose courage.

Fear not (there is nothing to fear), for I am with you; do not look around you in terror and be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen and harden you to difficulties; yes, I will help you; yes I will hold you up and retain you with My victorious right hand of rightness and justice. (Isaiah 41:10, Amplified).

Photo credit: beliefnet.com

Yesterday, I received an email that really got me riled up.

I doubted that the person who sent it meant any offense and it wasn’t a huge deal, but I was so ready to hit “reply” and defend myself.

So I did hit reply and my fingers were poised over the keyboard to let it fly…and then I remembered the verse Jesus had given to me in my quiet time with Him earlier that day:

Keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. —(I Peter 4:8).

Love covers.

Then He spoke to me again through another verse that I am committing to memory:

Whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him and let it drop, leave it, let it go in order that your Father, who is in Heaven  may also forgive you your own failings and shortcomings and let them drop. —(Mark 11: 25, emphasis added).

Drop it. Leave it. Let it go.

“But….”

Drop it. Leave it. Let it go.

You see, I still wanted to send that email. I have never  hesitated to stand up for myself and set someone straight. In my flesh without Jesus, I can be hot-headed and my words can be sharp.

But He wasn’t asking me to set anyone straight. He was asking me to consider my actions carefully. He was asking me to submit to HIS ways, to bring my feelings in line with His Word. He was asking me to show the same mercy and grace to this person as He has shown to me.  He was asking me to trust Him with my reputation. (Note: yes, there are times when  it is important to speak your mind. Being a Christ follower does not mean being a doormat. However, this situation did not call for that. It was simply a bruise to my ego).

I read in the apostle Paul’s letter to the Corinthian church that he made it His aim to please Jesus in all he did. (2 Cor. 5:9). The commentary in my ESV Bible said the following about this verse: “Paul lives his entire life in light of  the hope that his actions will bring delight to God day by day.” 

Would the words I intended to use in that email have brought delight to Jesus?

Was my desire to bring glory to Him?

That would be a big NO. 

Drop it. Leave it. Let it go.

So I did. (After complaining a little more to Jesus). But that’s okay. He is always listening and He cares about every single detail of our lives. He is the only One who can take all our negative feelings and attitudes and not be burdened down by them. He is also the only One who can give us the strength to make another choice. (Philippians 4:13).

Peace reigned in my heart and my sleep was sweet.

The following day, I saw  the writer of the email. Jesus had removed any irritation I felt.

What happened next made me smile. This person apologized and acknowledged that the email had been over the top.

I had kept my peace. I had not said words that I might later regret. I entrusted myself to Jesus.

Unbeknownst to me, He had worked on the writer’s heart and all was well.

I was so grateful that I had kept my big mouth shut and handled things His way. It is a beautiful thing to not have to regret words spoken rashly.

Knowing that this is going to happen again (opportunities for us  to get  offended are numerous), I looked at some Scriptures that teach us how to relate to others and made a list. This helped me immensely and I hope it helps you as well!

When you are offended and want to hit back, ask:

1. Will this display compassion,kindness, humility and gentleness?
2. Can I say or do this in the Name of Jesus?
3. Will this word or deed bring a blessing and give God’s grace?
4. Is what I want to do or say good and beneficial?
5. Will this promote peace and unity?
6. Will this build up or tear down?
7. Will this word or action grieve or sadden Jesus?
8. Am I imitating Jesus in this situation?
9. Am I remembering how much God has forgiven me?
10. Is it kind?
11. Am I following Christ’s example?

What are we commanded to do?

1. Bear with one another, forgiving whatever grievances you may have against on another.
2. Forgive as the Lord has forgiven you.
3. Whatever you do, whether in word or in deed, do it all in the Name of the Lord Jesus.
4. Live with complete lowliness of mind, humility, unselfishness, gentleness, mildness, and patience, bearing with one another and making allowances because you love one another.
5.Strip yourselves of your former nature (put off and discard your un-renewed self).
6. Be constantly renewed in the spirit of your mind (having a fresh mental and spiritual attitude) and put on the new nature (the regenerate self) created in God’s image.
7.Let all bitterness and indignation and wrath (passion, rage,bad temper) and resentment (anger, animosity) and quarreling (brawling, clamor, contention) and slander (evil speaking, abusive, or blasphemous language) be banished from you, with all malice (spite, ill-will, or baseness of any kind).
8. Walk in love (esteeming and delighting in one another.

If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. —(Romans 12:18).

(Scripture references: Colossians 3:12,17; Ephesians 4: 1-3, 15, 22, 24, 30-31; Ephesians 5: 1-2)

Photo credit: Google

We all know the story…

…the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.  

Shortly before dawn, Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost!” they said and cried out in fear.

But Jesus immediately said to them, “Take courage! It is I! Don’t be afraid!”

“Lord, if it’s You,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to You on the water!”

“Come, ” He said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. (Matthew 14: 24-29).

I have always read this passage and been amazed by the astonishing courage of Peter.

But then I read these words tonight from Emily Freeman: “We are all Peter, standing ankle deep in cold water. The Lord walks toward us, the arm of God stretched strong in our direction. 

We lock eyes and feel His invitation to hold His gaze.

There is nothing about His appearance that should draw us, yet we are pulled into the fullness of Heaven reflected in His dark eyes.”  —(A Million Little Ways, p. 85).

Those words stopped me in my tracks and took my breath away.

This story really isn’t about the astonishing courage of Peter.

It is about the astonishing magnetism of Jesus Christ, who brings the Kingdom of Heaven blazing to this earth.

Jesus is intensely personal with each of us who love Him.

In the midst of a raging and terrifying storm, the very eyes of God focus like a laser beam onto yours, drawing you closer to Him and away from fear, boredom, aimlessness, and stagnation. 

You see, you were never meant to stay inside the boat.

Jesus beckons you to join Him in His quest to bring the stunning beauty of redemption into the brokenness of this world.

He holds out His hand to you and invites you to leave the stifling confines of your comfort zone and walk with Him into a life that is lit with joy and filled with the unique adventure that comes when your heart is joined to the very heart of God Himself.

That heart that is filled with love, power, strength, passion, and LIFE.

This is the  irresistible Jesus that I know. 

I have chosen to leave the boat and even though the storms around me can look scary and threatening, I lock my eyes onto His.

I have never felt more alive.

The fears that once held me in place are gone.

His relentless love is transforming me, as my ugly is increasingly eclipsed by His beauty.

The chains that once bound me are falling away as I learn to walk in the glorious freedom that He died and rose again to give me.

The safety of the boat has lost its allure.

It’s a beautiful life.

Photo credit: Google

Every year, our  pastor gives us a theme for the new year that always rhymes with the number of the year.

It makes it easier to remember and by the time January is over, we are filled with fresh resolve to follow hard after Jesus.

This year’s theme is: Coming Clean in 2014.

No more hiding. No more masks. No more pretending to be strong when you feel like you are going to shatter into a million pieces. And certainly no more trying to hide from your Savior. (A pointless effort if there ever was one).

The following day, an email arrived in my inbox from one of the ladies who was in my small group for the fall’s Bible study. (The same email came to the other three facilitators as well).

This sweet lady was led to write to us after listening to our pastor’s sermon. She was tired of hiding. She could not plaster a big smile on her face any longer, cheerfully declaring that she was fine when her heart was breaking.

His sermon gave her the courage to remove her mask and reveal her heart by sharing her pain.

That took guts.

It is not easy to come clean and admit that life isn’t perfect; that in fact, it is  one big mess.

I texted her immediately and invited her to come over the next night. One of my fellow facilitators joined us and we had the privilege of listening to this young woman’s heart. She was raw, honest, and real.

The mask shattered…and her journey to freedom began.

She did not receive the one thing she feared most, which was condemnation.

Do you know why that was?

Because my friend and I have walked long enough with our sweet Jesus that we KNOW how broken we are, that there is NOTHING good in us apart from Him. Our track records are poor and the hopes we thought that this world was going to fulfill have been shown to be absolutely empty, hollow, and meaningless. We have messed up more times than we can count.

But this we know: Jesus is faithful. He redeems, restores, and rebuilds and we can never go so far that His grace cannot reach us.

There were no rocks to throw. Only grace and love to extend. As has been said, the ground is level at the cross. We are all in need of a Savior.

I could weep at the beautiful heart of Jesus. He saw one of His own in pain and filled her with the courage to reach out, type that email, and press send. Then He came to her through my friend and me. His Spirit in us ministered to her hurting heart through our hugs, our encouragement, our listening ears ,compassionate hearts and heartfelt prayers.

When she left my home that night, she shared that she felt as if a huge burden had been lifted from her shoulders. Her life did not miraculously change the next day. However, she now knows she is not alone, that her sisters in Christ are standing in the gap for her and praying on her behalf even if she lacks the strength to do so. She also knows that He is always working even when she can’t see it and that her prayers will be answered in His perfect time and in His perfect way. (We already have a  plan to celebrate when that happens. 🙂 ).

All because she was willing to come clean and throw away the mask that only serves to suffocate.

How are you bringing the love of Christ to those around you? While He is with us by His Spirit and speaks to us through His Word, we are not yet with Him physically. But that awesome day WILL come! (Revelation 22:4).

However, we have the incredible privilege of being His hands, His feet, His mouth, His ears, His arms to those precious ones who populate our lives.

Are you sensitive to His leading? Is He bringing someone to mind who could use some of your time or your resources?

Are you a safe place for people to come to who are searching for His hope, peace, and joy?

You don’t have to have all the answers. (Nobody does). You just have to be available.

Have you allowed Jesus to heal and free you enough that you can come clean with others about how He has met you in your sin with His grace?

There is no greater privilege than to represent Him to a lost and dying world.

Your Redeemer lives.

Follow His fearless heart into your world and share that good news with others as He leads.