Monthly Archives: April 2013

Things Left Unsaid


Photo credit: Google

The letter had been written, typed, and carefully packed into the luggage.

A heart spilled  out onto the page, sharing things that were easier to say with keyboard than with voice.

However, the man for whom the letter was intended would never read it.

His time on earth ended abruptly and he entered eternity just hours before his son would board a plane for a visit with him.

There would be no opportunity to say goodbye, to find closure, to discover what his father had wanted to say when he requested his son’s presence at his bedside.

Things will forever remain unsaid between them.

This is a tragedy.

So much time wasted.

Why do we continue to presume that we have days, months, years?

We have today. This moment. That’s it.

Take stock.

Is there anything left unsaid between you and a loved one?

Say them. Write them. Do whatever you have to do but make it right. (As far as it depends on you).

Let go of the small stuff that tends to accumulate in a heart and looms larger than it ever ought to be.

Humble yourself.

Choose love.

Seek peace.

Forgive…and  watch the self-imposed prison bars in your heart swing wide open to life and light.

In light of eternity, we are here on this spinning ball for but a moment.

Live and love with all your might.

“The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.”—Harriet Beecher Stowe

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Friday Photos: College Tours


Some things look fabulous on paper but in real life…not so much.

Such is the case with Williams College in the Berkshires. Williams-Providence-0050-1 We are at that season of our lives where school vacations are used for visiting colleges. Our son Josh graduates next year so this week, we traveled to Williams and Brown University. The instant we drove onto the Williams campus, the first thing we noticed was how picturesque it was. Williams-Providence-0046-1 Williams-Providence-0038-1 Williams-Providence-0059-1 Williams-Providence-0087-1 The second thing we noticed was how empty it was.

“Is the semester over?” I asked my husband as we pulled into the parking lot of our inn.

“I don’t think so,” he replied as we rolled our luggage inside the inn that time forgot.  The furnishings were circa 1985. Our large room boasted flowered wallpaper, a floral bedspread, and a bright yellow bathroom with bright yellow towels.

A trip to the front desk in the lobby yielded two suggestions for dinner. Mainly because there were only two restaurants open in town.

It was  6:00.

We were somewhat alarmed to suddenly hear the sound of loud angry voices with an Irish brogue coming from the bar area. Curiosity got the best of me and I crossed the room to see what was happening.

Turns out that a play was in progress. A sign trumpeting the name of the production was placed at the bar entrance. The actors were scattered throughout the bar while the patrons looked on.

Must be western Massachusetts’ form of theater art. The actors seemed quite talented and the audience as clearly enjoying themselves but I just found it to be the oddest thing.

We left the hotel and headed into town to the recommended restaurant.

Once again, the campus was nearly deserted.

We live in a town of 6400 people.

This place made our town look like Times Square on a Saturday night.

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We passed through the bar on the way to the dining room. It was nearly full and the customers were loud.

By the time we were finished eating our dinner, the bar was crowded and several people were quite drunk. Josh theorized that it was because there was nothing to do in this town.

This was only Monday night! We could only imagine what it would be like on the weekends.

We had high hopes for the information session the following day.

Those hopes were soon dashed.

The man who led the session was very sincere and well-meaning. The problem was that he seemed hard-pressed to come up with even one valid reason why anyone should choose to attend this school. He spoke in a rambling monotone and was  so boring that the majority of our group left. I looked longingly at the mom beside me who was able to read her Kindle because she was perfectly positioned to hide behind her son.

The very instant the session was over, we made a beeline for the car, as there was no way we were staying for the tour, as Josh declared this college to be “soul crushing.”

Doug and I had to agree.

When we returned to our car, this is the sight that greeted us:

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The cat gazed at us  with a certain air of disdain as if to say, “What are YOU doing here???” (Despite the fact that he was on the roof of our car!).

We couldn’t leave until he decided he was good and ready to get down from his perch.

As has been said,  it’s a cat’s world. We all just live in it. 🙂

We were so happy to leave western Massachusetts behind and head to the lovely town of Providence, Rhode Island.

We all fell in love with the Brown campus.

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Brown U-0057-2The atmosphere on campus was electric, happy, and exciting.

It was the anti-Williams.

The information session was led by two bright-eyed, winsome students who immediately engaged all of us with their sense of humor and enthusiasm.

I practically fell out of my seat when they spoke of a most wondrous thing: there are NO general education requirements at Brown! None!

The student is free to design their own curriculum, taking only classes for their major and those that interest them.

Why did my university not subscribe to this amazing concept?!?!

All my life, I have hated math with the white-hot fury of one thousand suns.

Yet I had to struggle three times just to (barely) pass college algebra. It nearly gave me a nervous breakdown.

That alone would make Brown my #1 choice for a college!

As for Josh, NYU is still his #1 choice, followed closely by Brown.

If only he possessed ambition and had some goals. 🙂

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We headed over to Thayer Street for lunch. On the way there, we heard the loud and clear voice of a street preacher on one of the corners.

Brown U-0143-2Most people ignored him. One man openly mocked him from across the street, hurling insults in between taking deep drags from his cigarette. Others laughed in derision.

Still he preached on undeterred, inviting people to come to him to hear about Jesus.

I admired his courage.

After a delicious lunch, we drove through downtown Providence on the way toward home.

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All in all, it was a successful trip.

I find that I am treasuring these increasingly rare times when just the four of us all together, knowing that this season of life when both our kids are living under our roof is rapidly drawing to a close.

My kids think I am being overly-sentimental and maybe so.

But a few decades from now, when they are making these same trips on behalf of their own children, they will understand.

How did it get so late so soon?
It’s night before it’s afternoon.
December is here before it’s June.
My goodness how time has flewn.
How did it get so late so soon?
—Dr. Seuss

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The Art Of Making Memories


I came home from my walk tonight to see a shocking sight: my husband was giving our 15 1/2 year old daughter her first driving lesson.

I was just totally unprepared to see Julia behind the wheel of her dad’s car. I smiled and gave her the thumbs up. Then I went inside and watched from the window.  Better Doug doing this than me, as he definitely has the temperament for it. Nobody who knows me would ever pair my name with the word “calm.” 🙂

Earlier today, I was leading a discussion group at the Mom To Mom program at our church. We were talking about the things that our kids will remember once they are grown: and it’s NOT how clean the house was. It is the time spent together making memories.

And the laughter. They will always remember the laughter.

I am reminded of a story the late, great Barbara Johnson told in one of her many books.

She had four boys who kept her on her toes all the time.

One day, she came home to find that her sons had whipped up a bowl of red jello…and then promptly took great delight in picking up handfuls of the slippery substance and throwing it against the kitchen wall, marveling at all the cool patterns it made.

Can you imagine?

At that moment, Barbara knew she had a choice to make. She could bring down the hammer (which her boys were clearly expecting her to do) or she could join in the fun.

She chose to join in the fun.

Much to her sons’ total shock, she marched over to the bowl, picked up a giant handful and flung it against the wall with all her might.

Neither Barbara nor her four boys ever forgot the joy of that day. Yes, there was a mess, but messes can be cleaned up and forgotten. In contrast, memories live forever in our hearts.

Memories from my years with Julia ran through my mind as I watched her drive a car for the first time and it was sweet.

Just for today, make the decision to lighten up.

Smile more.

Laugh out loud and often.

Make time for play.

Step out of your comfort zone and into a new adventure.

Look past the mess and see the person in front of you.

Remember that you can have a clean and orderly house when the kids are grown.

Be willing to fully enter into the world of your child, even if it is only for a few moments. Be completely present. Make intentional eye contact. This moment will not come again.

If you have little ones, get down on the floor and play with them.

Be willing to get your hands dirty.

Pull up a stool beside you in the kitchen and let your child help you bake cookies or make a meal.

Dream with your child.

Listen to their prayers.

Cuddle up and read a favorite story. The housework can wait.

Place newspaper over the surface of the kitchen table, pull out some blank construction paper and allow them to paint.

Put on some music and dance.

Pull your kitchen chairs into the living room, grab a bunch of blankets, and make a fort.

Celebrate the gift of now.

Tuck the memories you make deep in your heart. It is those same memories that will bind your heart to your children for the rest of your days.

“Nothing is ever really lost to us as long as we remember it.”—L.M. Montgomery

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Pray For Boston


Photo credit: rebloggy

The first hint that anything was wrong was when I checked my news feed on Facebook.

One of my friends mentioned that something terrible had happened in Boston.

I immediately turned on the TV and pictures of horror filled the screen as my eyes filled with tears.

Terrorism, I thought, despite the anchor’s attempting to reassure the viewing audience that it could have been some kind of natural event, such as a gas explosion.

Ironically, my husband and I had watched the movie Zero Dark Thirty (about the capture and death of Osama bin Laden) the night before, so the horrors of terrorism were fresh in my mind. Such unspeakable evil is impossible to fathom.

After an hour of watching news coverage, I had to get out of the house. I grabbed my keys and headed out into the sunny spring afternoon.

I needed to see my kids.

I opened the windows to capture the fresh spring air and took several deep breaths.  I played Steven Curtis Chapman’s song “Beauty Will Rise” which is one of my go-to songs when I feel overwhelmed by hard things. It is a song of fierce, defiant hope in the face of tragedy.

On the short drive to the high school, I took in the sights of the beautiful town that I am blessed to call home.

An elderly couple strolled along the lake hand in hand.

A little boy was excitedly baiting his hook in anticipation of a fishing expedition, while his mother looked on with obvious delight.

Another boy was helping his dad unload two kayaks from the back of a pickup truck. The ice is finally gone, beckoning the hardiest of souls to come and christen a new season of water fun.

One of the local ice cream stands in town had just re-opened for the season on Saturday. This day several patrons sat on the multi-colored picnic tables enjoying their creamy treats, a tantalizing preview of the summer days to come.

As I drove up to the high school track, the first person I saw was my son.

I burst into tears.

I parked my car in the student parking lot that overlooks the track where the team was practicing.  I searched for my daughter, finally spotting her  throwing the javelin on the far-way field. I was grateful that she had chosen to wear a neon-pink shirt that made her easier to spot, as these middle-aged eyes of mine are not what they used to be.

My tears fell as I watched the team, still blissfully ignorant of the evil that was unfolding a mere two hours away from our town.  They were full of the life, energy and joy that teenagers can bring into our worlds.

One of the javelin throwers ( known by all for his high-wattage, fun personality) twirled his javelin like it was a baton. (That made me smile) .A relay runner crossed the finish line after a practice run and immediately began to dance in the football field, her blue baton gleaming in the sunshine as she twirled. Two of my son’s friends ran competitive wind sprints, the one holding out his hand in congratulations to the other who had crossed the finish line first.

Frequent bursts of laughter were carried on the wind and into my car…a balm for my soul.

Life always goes on.

I headed for home. This time, I took the back way and drove past the smaller lake that is graced by the afternoon sun. It looked as if someone had sprinkled diamonds all across the surface of the water. The water was calm, smooth…the complete opposite of the churning that was going on in my heart.

I was still listening to “Beauty Will Rise” on a loop.

I tuned into the bridge of the song:

I can hear it in the distance
And it’s not too far away
It’s the music and the laughter
Of a  Wedding and a Feast
I can almost feel the hand of God
Reaching for my face to wipe the tears away
And say,”It’s time to make everything new.
Make it all new.”

If these words seem mysterious to you, look up Revelation 19:6-9 and Revelation 21-22. These passages invite us to eavesdrop on a coming day when evil is permanently vanquished and peace and love and  beauty and light will reign for all eternity.

Darkness. Does. NOT. win.

The Light shines on in the darkness, for the darkness has never overpowered it. —John 1:5

Pray for the people of Boston.

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A Day With Patsy Clairmont


There are some people who are just firecrackers of joy.

One such person is famed Women Of Faith speaker and author Patsy Clairmont.

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This past weekend, she came to southern New Hampshire to spread her unique and dynamic brand of merriment and charm and I am all the better for it.

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Here are some of the highlights from my notes:

*We must relinquish our “right” to have all the answers from our sovereign God.

*Place yourself in a position to say “yes” to the Lord. Then do whatever He tells you to do, no matter how small. We always want to go straight to the “big” things but we must first be faithful with the little things.  And know that when you say “yes” to Jesus, life does not become a bed of roses. Sometimes life will get really hard. This is life on a broken planet.

*Growing up in Jesus is a life-long process. As long as we have breath, we can still choose to say “yes” to Him. Change is always possible.

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*If you are one who struggles with your mind and your mouth being godly, study what the Bible has to say on those subjects. Memorize His Word. Give Him a big “yes!” on these  things. Then watch to see how your relationships are renewed and restored.

*Follow this prescription when you are worried or angry:
1.Refuse the ungodly thought.
2.Replace it with God’s Word.
3.Repeat as needed until your thoughts and words line up with God and His ways.

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*Choose to believe His Word in the hard places, especially when it looks like things are not going to work out.  We must trust that He is in it with us and will do good to us. Beware of going off in tangents in your mind. Stop allowing yourself to go to the worst case scenarios. That is not walking by faith.

 *Cast down imaginations, things that are unlovely or ungodly. We constantly need the intervention of Philippians 4:8: “…fill your mind and meditate on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst, the beautiful, not the ugly, things to praise not things to curse.” (The Message).

*We cannot base our perception of Jesus on our brokenness but on the truth of His Word.

*The truth is, we are in conflict with those who display the very qualities we have not owned. We need help with ourselves. Once we begin to own our stuff, He will give us “grace space” inside our hearts, which will tenderize our hearts toward that person.

*These four words have the possibility to change your life: EMOTIONS DON’T HAVE BRAINS. This was a quote from Marilyn Meberg and it has changed Patsy’s life. Emotions are not intended to think for us. They are not reasonable. Emotions have great significance but we cannot allow our feelings to dictate our response to life.

*Fear should never stop us. We need to go right through the middle of the fear to gain victory. His grace is sufficient for us.

*Jesus is our Need-Meeter. When we try to meet our own need, that need will turn to greed. Then you find you can never get enough, no matter what it is (food, money, sex, shopping).  When you take your need to Jesus, He turns it to seed.

*Don’t be resistant toward those who tell you the truth. Don’t be afraid of truth. Own your stuff. In every heart, there is a cemetery of sorrow. Go in there every now and again and feel it, own it. That way, you can then minister and speak truth to others in love. Denial does not help anybody.

*Recognize that that cranky, obnoxious person who drives you crazy is in a lot of pain. That doesn’t make their behavior right, but life is hard.  Be kind. Living out kindness in this harsh world is powerful. Enter tenderly into the lives of others because we do not know how  they are suffering.

*Courage is telling the truth with your whole heart (a quote Patsy loved from an author named Renee Brown).

*Do all you can to stay in the Light of Christ.

*When the enemy tries to destroy your with his lies, rise up and say, “I refuse this in the mighty Name of Jesus.” Hide His Word in your heart so you can rehearse what He says is true of you.

*Don’t resist what God wants to do in your heart.  Just start with “yes” to Jesus. Surrender to His divine purpose.

During the last hour of Patsy’s time with us, she took questions from the audience. She held the hand-written note cards in her hands and when she saw what was written on one of the last cards, she paused, a shadow of pain passing over her face that had just been creased in smiles a few moments before.

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She then read these words, “ I am the mother of two teenage daughters and I have been diagnosed with a terminal disease. I am struggling to hold onto my faith.” 

Still holding the card, Patsy looked out over the vast audience of women and asked, “Honey, if you are okay with this, can I  ask if you would stand up? If you don’t want to do that, that’s okay too. We will still pray for you.”

At the very back of the room, a woman in her forties rose to her feet. Her eyes were dry, her shoulders pulled back straight.

My first thought was, “She doesn’t even look sick.” Just by looking at her, I never would have known anything was wrong.

Another reminder to never assume anything about anybody. We don’t know.

“Honey, would you mind coming up here to the front?”

The enormous room was silent as she walked up to the stage, every eye riveted on her face. The sounds of sniffles could be heard throughout the crowd. I think that every mama’s heart went out to that woman.

Patsy bent down to reach out and take this woman’s hand. She asked her name and the woman told her in a clear voice. Patsy then asked for some volunteers to come surround their fellow sister in Christ.  Several women came to the front, wrapping their arms around her, stroking her hair.

Patsy prayed a most heartfelt prayer and as I looked at the scene before me, I realized anew that Jesus was in this place in a very special way. Until He returns and we are with Him physically, He asks His people to be His hands, feet, mouth, ears, and eyes for Him. Jesus was coming to this woman through the love of His women.

It was a beautiful sight of unity and love.

Once the woman walked back to her seat, everyone was wiping their eyes.

Patsy waited a beat, then said something funny, yet appropriate. That is a tough tightrope to walk, but she handled it with grace, class, and warmth.

 We all gratefully exhaled. It was as if a fresh breeze rushed through that room, bringing the hope that Jesus so freely offers us like a balm to our souls.

“Laughter brings healing and allows us to breathe deeper,” Patsy said. “God created laughter. It helps us to survive. It has been said that children laugh 400 times a day while adults average only 15 laughs per day.”

Then she encouraged us, “If you have the ability to laugh, use your gift. People need it.”

I am so grateful that Patsy graced us with her gift of laughter and wisdom this past weekend.

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She is truly a treasure.

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Something Beautiful


When I was young, my family went every year to see The Bill Gaither Trio in concert when they came to Pittsburgh.

Their music provided much of the soundtrack of my early years and it is a sweet memory.

This morning as I was reading the Daily Bread during my quiet time, I was reminded of one of their songs, Something Beautiful.

Something beautiful, something good
All my confusion He understood
All I had to offer Him was brokenness and strife
But He made something beautiful of my life.

Can you believe this very moment that Jesus can make something beautiful of your life?

If all you see is brokenness, please remember that that does not disqualify you! We are all broken in some way. That is why we needed our Savior to come to us.

That very brokenness is what Jesus will use to rebuild your life on the rock-solid foundation of His Word.

Cling to His precious promises.

Submit your fickle feelings to the timeless and unchanging truths of His Word. Relegate them to their proper place and refuse to allow them to rule your spirit any longer. Rather, pray for the Holy Spirit to rule you instead, filling you with His fearless courage, blazing love, and endless hope.

Recognize that the things you can see are only the tip of the iceberg compared to His unlimited and perfect knowledge.

Then you will find that Jesus is always leading you in triumph as trophies of His victory (2 Corinthians 2:14).

And you will discover, to your delight and awe, that Jesus is doing what He always does: bringing breathtaking beauty from the ashes.

Our enemy, our circumstances, our sin do not have the last word in our lives. Not ever.

The Cross says so. It is finished!

The empty tomb says so. He is risen!

Tucked into the Old Testament book of Joel is a dazzling promise that sparkles like a diamond against a black velvet background:

Fear not…be glad and rejoice because the Lord has done great things…I will restore or replace for you the years that the locusts have eaten..and you shall eat in plenty and be satisfied and praise the Name of the Lord your God, who has dealt wondrously with you. And my people shall never be put to shame. And you shall know, understand, and realize that I am in the midst of (you) and that I am your God and there is none else. My people shall never be put to shame.” (Joel 2: 21-27)

Have the locusts invaded your life, stripping, devouring, devastating?

Look up. Draw close to God.

The word “restore” in this verse is shalam and it means: “to be at peace, to live in peace, to make whole, to make good, to complete, to recompense, reward, to be repaid.”

Dear one, the above is what He is doing in your sweet life at this very moment if you belong to Him. He is always at work. You are His beloved, the apple of His eye.

Leave room for Him to do His redemptive work in His perfect way. Let Him write the story of your life. I promise you it turns out well.

The One who is Beauty makes all things beautiful in His time.

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Friday Photos: Easter Sunrise


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I was lost in utter darkness
Until You came and rescued me
I was bound by all my sin when
Your love came and set me free
Now my soul can sing a new song
Now my heart has found a home
Now Your grace is always with me
And I’ll never be alone.
—-Come Thou Fount, Come Thou King

I hope your Resurrection Sunday was a most beautiful celebration! 🙂

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Waiting For Redemption


Photo credit: Word Trace

Yesterday, I listened to author/Bible teacher Jill Briscoe teach on the subject of “Waiting It Out: Helps For the Long Haul.”

She was discussing how hard it is to wait for God’s perfect timing when He has allowed us to enter into a wilderness. We simply want OUT.  But until that time comes, we are consigned to waiting.

At one point, she shared something that immediately caught my attention: “Waiting with an attitude of acceptance (rather than resignation) allows me to wait expectantly and say to the Lord, ‘I will watch to see how You bring redemption from this mess.”

I absolutely LOVE that attitude, that sense of expectancy, that rock-solid, God-given HOPE that Jesus’s death on the Cross purchased for us.

Redemption is what Jesus does! Redemption is His specialty, His passion, His delight, His purpose, His greatest gift to us!

There is not one person, not one situation that He cannot redeem!

In Him we have redemption (deliverance and salvation) through His blood (the remission) and forgiveness of our sins… in accordance with the riches and the generosity of His gracious favor. (Ephesians 1:7).

The word redemption means: “a releasing effected by payment of ransom, deliverance, liberation, rescue.”

On the Cross, Jesus did for us what we could never do for ourselves: give us right standing before a holy God when He took our penalty for our sin onto Himself.

In that one momentous, victorious,  earth-shattering moment, He took care of our greatest need once and for all.

Glorious, beautiful and eternal redemption became ours! We have been given the greatest gift in the history of the world!

The good news is that that same redemption continues its triumphant march today both across the stories of our lives and the fragile terrain of our hearts.

His redemption is capable of  reaching  into and utterly transforming every single area of our lives, the good, the bad, and the ugly. His redemption is capable of making all things beautiful in His perfect timing.

Our role is to let Him.

We can choose to either fight Him or to surrender to His loving care and good purpose.

We can choose to become bitter as we wait or we can choose to wait expectantly and with blazing hope in our Savior who is forever with us.

I have seen His gracious gift of redemption in my own life in countless ways. There have been situations where I thought my heart was going to break or stop beating altogether. I did not see any way out. Yet…in His own supremely loving and gentle way, He absolutely astonished me as I watched Him redeem each and every painful situation in ways that left me filled with breathless wonder and amazement. I will never get over those things. They are the precious cords that bind my grateful heart to my all-powerful and wondrous Redeemer and Savior.

Elisabeth Elliot famously said, “In acceptance lies peace.”

If today finds you in a wilderness or in the midst of a mess, would you choose to accept that Jesus is right there with you? He has not forgotten you. He knows. He sees.

Would you allow Him to fill your heart with His peace?

Would you trust His Word more than you trust your feelings?

And will you begin to praise Him right now for the fact that He will allow you to see–whether on this earth or in eternity— His magnificent, shining, triumphant  gift of redemption in this situation?

The Master Artist is always at work! And He only makes masterpieces!

“Leave it all in the Hands that were wounded for you.”—Elisabeth Elliot

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